Like A Soccer Field, Remain Unchanged
Do you ever feel overwhelmed by your thoughts and feelings? Sometimes they are the positive roadmap to your life, but sometimes they make you feel poorly about yourself or about your experiences. Does it ever feel like you are a product of your thoughts? Are we a product of our thoughts? Well, we can be—but we don’t have to be.
As a lifelong soccer player, metaphors that include sports often help me understand concepts to a higher degree. So, I’ll give you a soccer metaphor for your thoughts.
Think about a soccer field, sometimes it is empty and calm with nothing going on. Other times, it can be full of rowdiness, excitement, joy, and anger. What happens on the soccer field depends on what is happening on the field, the team playing, the crowds, etc.
Think about a professional soccer game: the fans are rowdy, full of emotion. They can yell abuse or get angry if they don’t agree with a referee’s call, or they don’t think feel their team is playing particularly well. When the game is over, the crowd disappears along with their comments and energy, but the soccer field stays and it remains unchanged—despite all of the nasty things may have been said throughout the game.
Now think about a youth soccer game, there’s lots of parents, siblings, and other family members. There is a lot of cheering coming from the crowd and the occasional passionate/competitive parent, but overall the crowd is mostly well behaved. The atmosphere of the field changes based on how the teams are playing, and what comments and judgements the crowd makes when supporting their team. Still, when the game ends and the crowd leaves, the field remains unchanged.
The soccer field doesn’t care who’s playing on it, who’s winning or losing, or what type of energy the crowds bring. The field is the platform upon which the game is played. The teams, players, and crowds come and go, meanwhile the field stays the same. The field does not change depending on the experience or the atmosphere, or the positivity or negativity of the crowds, which all constantly change.
We are the platform upon which our thoughts and feelings come and go. We are not the game—we do not change, just like the soccer field. We must allow our thoughts and feelings to play their game without changing us. We can witness our thoughts, feelings, and actions without allowing them to define us. Just like how the soccer field is separate from the constantly changing environment that exists on it, we have to separate ourselves from the content of our thoughts and recognize they are simply thoughts—they will come and go, yet we will remain unchanged.
Next time you have a quiet minute to yourself, take a moment to sit and notice what you can hear. Be aware that you are noticing. Notice what your mind might be saying and be aware that you are noticing. Notice what you can hear, and most importantly (for the third time) be aware what you are noticing. Notice any thoughts that come about, notice what you can smell or touch. If you can notice all of these things, and be aware that you are noticing, this is you observing yourself.
It is important to remember to step back, gain perspective, and become aware that there is a silent witness inside of us that observes without judgement, and cannot be touched, harmed, or changed—be the silent witness. Remain unchanged.
Are you having trouble navigating your thoughts and feelings during this challenging time? If so, schedule an appointment so we can talk through it and get you on the road to feeling better.